To help couples with their communication and relationship issues we’re talking about how to understand the differences between the way men and women talk and think. As i mentioned in the previous clip, although our current life style is very different than how our ancestors lived millions of years ago, men and women still have the same “old part of the brain” and tend to maintain the old style of communication and thinking patterns. Scientists believe its because our brains haven’t had much time to evolve to fit today’s fast paced life style. You might compare it to the computer world, in other words, we are using out of date hardware and software to do a new job. Helping men and women with their relationship problems involves helping them understand the way each other thinks and communicates. Problems come up when we try to change our men or women to suit our needs and not accept eachother’s differences. Besides the obvious differences between a mans and woman’s body, their brains are different too. A man’s skull is generally thicker and stronger than a woman’s…so that saying that “men are thick-headed” is probably where that came from. In brain imaging technology, researchers have found that generally, men use a good deal of the left hemisphere of their brains when talking and listening. Now, women have four times as many brain cells connecting the right and left sides of the brain. That doesn’t necessarily mean that women are smarter…but that they have greater access to their right brain, which is about language and emotion. Women are obviously more verbal and emotional than men and are also able to focus on more than one problem at one time and can usually multi- task easier than men. Women are also usually more concerned about how problems are solved and how that affects their relationships. Men generally deal with problems as an opportunity to show their competence and strength. They are into assuming authority and taking care of problems in the most effective and direct way. Unlike women, men can set aside their feelings and focus on solving one problem at a time. Men feel closer in relationships is by feeling validated through shared activities whether they’re physical like sports, outdoor activities, sex, competition or analytic and mentally focused. Women feel closer and validated through communication, intimate sharing of experiences and personal information. Understanding all these differences can really help men and women more clearly interpret where their parners are coming from and keep them from taking things personally.

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